The Big Bad Diet Wolf

Once upon a time there lived three little pigs and one wolf.

The first little pig lived in a house of straw. During the holidays, there were long straws for milkshakes, short straws for chocolate cocoa n' marshmallows, and curly straws for eggnog. Pig One loved to use the curly straws during the holiday months.

Pig Two lived in a house of sticks. During the holidays, there was stick of butter here, and a stick of cheesy garlic bread there and a stick of peppermint candy over there. Pig Two loved having plenty of candy canes of all different flavors in his home, especially during the holiday months.

Pig Three lived in a house of bricks. During the holiday season, there was brick cheese here, and brick chili there and brick oven pizza there. Pig Three loved enjoying his Village-Famous 'Brick Pit-House Chili', especially during the holiday months.

One day, a wolf moved into the village. A stinky wolf. A looting wolf! A sly and nasty wolf.

As you can probably fill in the blanks from here - or at least most of them, we'll shorten our tale by saying that through Wolf's cunningness, he blew down three - yes THREE houses and stole all the goodies therein.

Oh, what a sad day in the Village for those three little pigs. No straws, no sticks, no bricks - and right during the holiday festivities, at that!

Shortly thereafter, Pig 1, Pig 2 and Pig 3 began to notice a decrease in their waistlines. They were almost pre-festivity size. Oh my - what had prompted this sudden holiday magic of slimness?

And then it hit them....like a ton of bricks.

All those tasty holiday yum-yums had been responsible for widening their girth. Better yet, the goodies eventually fattened up the big bad wolf who was caught just in time to perform his punishment - spring house cleaning for the three slimmer pigs.