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Diet Humor.

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Dieting Woes of The Five Crows

The dieting woes of the five crows. Can you relate?

Five crows - Mo, Yo, So, Wo & Ho, sat on a barbwire fence,
Arguing and complaining about the validity of Diet Defense.

Yo said, "I'm a little fat, but I'm content,
No diet for me, I'll not repent."

Mo said, "I'm with Yo and do agree,
That mo is best when it comes to me."

Ho said, "You two, you do beat all,
Yo backsides barely fit down the hall."

"Hall, woman - we ain't got no worries,
For we live in the trees with dingleberries."

So Crow went on with, "We may be plump,
Have trouble flying with our big rump,
But we ain't gonna fly on a diet plan,
We're gonna continue to eat cuz we can."

Wo looked at So and shook his feathers,
And he had his own personal set of rathers.
He wanted to fly high, fly hard and fly long,
Didn't want his life cut short, or his song.

And Wo being the smartest of the bunch,
He told them all that he had a good hunch.

"Let's all depart and separate,
Meet here again at a later date.
Say six months and we'll convene,
See what's best, being fat or lean?"

Five crows - Mo, Yo, So, Wo & Ho flew off the barbwire fence,
Curious to try out their thoughts and convictions on Diet Defense.

Six months later, to the very minute,
Wo flew over and on the fence he lit.

He waited on the barbwire long and patiently,
For two days, no other crows did he see.

On day three a smelly vulture landed by his side,
Said, "Name's Jake and I've something to tell your hide.
For I bring news of your mates Mo, Yo, So & Ho,
Of how they faired, these four diet crows.

Mo Crow ate, and ate, and ate till he felt po,
Was found foundered, and he ain't no Mo.

Yo Crow repented to a fad diet of rice,
Now he's six feet under in paradise.

So Crow too decided on a fad diet plan,
And he too, kicked the can.

Ho Crow met a rich feathered gent,
And I ain't seen that she-crow since.

So that's the news I bring you today,
And only because I was flying this way."

Jake flew off into the foggy dew,
While Wo Crow felt a bit confused.

He had expected a moral for diet defense,
Not to be alone on this rusty old fence.

He finally supposed that three crows died from diet amuck,
While Ho Crow simply happened to be of good luck.

Exhausted of Diet Thoughts both good and bad,
Wo Crow was just glad it weren't him that was dead.

Away from the dew and into the bright light,
A stronger crow, Wo sailed like a well-weathered kite.

He thought on, "It's good to diet, and it's good to be thin,
But a bad diet can sure do a flock of crows in...."


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Dieting Woes of The Five Crows

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